Holy Water by Big & Rich

I directed anyone from myspace to came here if they wanted to follow my blog. So, this is an updat for anyone from myspace.

UPDATE

It's been almost a whole year, but I finally went back onto myspace. And now practically everyone is on facebook. Yay.

My first semester of college is over. I still have no major.

I got highlights for the first time. They were not what I had hoped and do not really compliment my hair.

I am now 19. But, what does a number mean? I've been on this planet long enough to circle the sun 19 times. Yay.

Truly, I believe that wisdom is the real teller of age. And wisdom does not only come from experience but from the lessons learned from those experiences. I have few life experiences and fewer lessons from those experiences, so I find myself not at all the true age of an adult.

Although, there have been experiences that are only to be called adult experiences. They have made me think so very much lately (partly the reason I do less and think more) that it makes me feel so worn I should feel to be much older.

I am, as ever, a walking contradiction.

I read, but not as much as I used to. I listen to music, but not as much as I used to (due, in part, to my car radio that seems to be incapable of producing anything more than static). My drawings are nonexistent and I sing more in solitude. My pitiful writings are at a standstill. I do not hold the concentration to sit and focus enough to come up with words that are pleasing enough to create a decent plotline.

My family. I will not go into that now.

I have writen enough for today. If anyone should actually happen upon this, congrats. You have found a long lost blog spot I only just remembered about a few days ago. Only three people knew about this place previously and have long since looked at it. What a great place to write and not really feel that anyone should truly see it. One can almost be fully open in what they write.

Almost.

Sparkle by Rubyhorse (LOOK IT UP!)

Christmas is quickly approaching and I feel as if it was just graduation. I'm already done with my first semester of college. Time seems to go so fast and so slow all at once. I sit here and think of what I have accomplished and find I cannot write anything down. Yet, I feel as if I have been all over and I do so many things that I am crazed.
I guess that none of what I have done really counts as anything. I have no direction, no goal, no motivation. I would much rather sit and daydream, where I am content and happy than look at the life I have which is going no where fast. I used to have so many dreams but now I have become so pessimistic I cannot fathom reaching any of my previous ideas. Maybe, one day, I will find that drive, that vigor, that spark that will light the youthful fantasies again and I will become the person I used to dream of.